Antidote
by mozzafiato
Summary: An antidote is generally known as a remedy for poison. Sometimes that's what you need. But what happens when you need an antidote for other things? For pain, longing, fear, or even love? Rated T for dark themes- will probably change to M later on. -ON HIATUS-
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** **Six years later, I still don't own Teen Titans and I hate myself every day for it. :( Thanks Obama.**

* * *

 _Chapter 1_

It had been three years.

A man with vividly green skin stood in the middle of the sidewalk, glaring absentmindedly at the blaring newspaper headline.

" **THREE YEARS SINCE END OF TEEN TITANS. WHERE ARE THEY NOW?** "

Had it really been that long?

Three years since he'd played video games with Cyborg.

Three years since he'd helped Robin with paperwork.

Three years since he'd had any Tamaranean cuisine.

Three years since anyone had seen or heard any sign of life from Raven.

Three whole, entire years since he had been a Titan. A crime fighter. A hero.

Well, that last one was debatable to some, at least. The changeling now worked as a paramedic, taking time in between shifts to visit kids at the children's hospital, raising spirits one green animal at a time. Both occupations seemed to be a good use of his abilities. While rare, there were a few opportunities for his powers to come in handy as a paramedic. Like how a couple of weeks ago, he had entered the trunk of a crushed car as a mouse and transformed into a rhinoceros once inside, allowing quick access to a trapped young couple. Mostly, though, he was good at his job due to the immense amount of first-aid training and hands-on experience he had received in his days as a Titan.

The man briefly wondered why he hadn't been sought out to interview for the article. He supposed it was because his ex-teammates, save for a certain empath, had chosen to remain relatively within the limelight. Still somewhat strange, considering how easy he was to place with his green skin. While he had certainly undergone the most drastic physical change of everyone, that would never be something to budge. Whatever the reason, he was grateful nonetheless. Nowadays, Garfield Logan preferred to dwell on the sidelines. If he ever happened upon an incident, he'd take action when necessary- what kind of person would he be if he didn't?- but if possible, he always tried to get the authorities involved before stepping in himself. It just wasn't his responsibility anymore. He knew his days of crime-fighting were over.

The same could be said for _most_ of the other titans as well. Robin- or Richard Grayson, rather- had unsurprisingly kept his foot in the door. He was now the Bludhaven Police Chief; just far enough from Batman to keep his sense of self (and his sanity) in tact, while still holding power over the area's crime world. Last thing Garfield knew of Starfire, now known as Kori Anders, she had gone on to become a Metropolis-area news reporter, engaged to none other than the police chief himself.

Victor Stone, his cybernetic friend and the only one he had remained in semi-close contact with, had opted to remain in the area as well. He was now a big-wig sports doctor and researcher up in Star City, not too far from Jump itself. The two met up for lunch or drinks once or twice a year, checking in with each other every now and then the way old acquaintances do. After the Titans disbanded, courtesy of Jump City's newly-appointed corrupt mayor Mr. Dwayne Pearson and his council, most of the team had attempted to stay in close contact with each other. However, as they adjusted to civilian life, it just got more and more difficult to make plans until they all just... stopped trying.

To the others it must feel like a lifetime ago. Staring at this newspaper headline, though, Garfield Logan could hardly believe it had been more than a few months. He was assaulted with what seemed like millions of pent up emotions at once; he experienced the familiar sensation of his chest tightening, his muscles all simultaneously tensed up, and his senses, animal and non, began to go into hyperdrive.

The changeling finally pulled himself away from the newspaper stand, searching frantically for a secluded spot within the busy streets of Jump City. Taking a right turn into an alleyway, the man walked just far enough from the street for people to not bother him before slumping against the red brick wall and roughly sliding into a sitting position. He tried to avoid drawing his knees in toward his chest, knowing that medically it was the wrong thing to do, but it was the only remotely comforting position his mind could conjure at the moment. He rested his head on his knees, lazily digging through his pocket for some earphones as he struggled to fill his lungs with an adequate amount of air. He gave up on the earphones quickly, opting instead to focus on his breathing. Four beats in through his nose, eight beats out through his mouth.

Four... Eight...

Four... Eight...

Sigh.

Panic attacks were fairly new to him. They had started occurring out of nowhere about a year ago, becoming more and more frequent as time went on. But that didn't exactly make them easier to deal with. He had experienced random bouts of anxiety growing up, but nothing compared to this. It was something he had only ever felt comfortable discussing with Raven. It was also one of the many things they had started bonding over before they were blindsided by the end of the Teen Titans.

He shuddered.

Raven.

His stomach churned at the thought of the sorceress. What could have possibly happened to her, where she might be, whether she even thought of any of them anymore. He shook his head rapidly, trying to snap himself out of it.

If she was even alive.

The last of them to have spoken to Raven was Kori, a little over a week after news of the city's decision had been brought to light. They had gone out for coffee, and nothing seemed unusual. That was all she had been able to tell them. Despite the numerous occasions Gar had begged her for more information, Kori's claim that everything had seemed normal remained unchanging. She always looked heartbroken repeating it, so he had eventually stopped asking. At the time, they had all left the tower just a day prior, and were getting settled in to their new respective homes. They had all promised to keep in contact and meet up at least once a week. No one had heard from Raven since.

Garfield jumped at the sound of an obnoxiously loud garbage truck emptying a dumpster at the other end of the alley. This thinking certainly wasn't helping his current condition. Even so, able to take a mostly deep breath, he stood up and brushed off his scrubs, reentering the crowded sidewalk and making his way to the local hospital for work.

* * *

Over the years he had happened upon the likes of Doctor Light, Control Freak, and even Mad Mod. So as he strolled past room after room, making his way to the EMS office, it should have come as no surprise when Garfield peered into one of the rooms to see none other than Adonis. And it didn't. What he did find surprising, however, was the way he was staring blankly straight ahead, actively ignoring the slew of questions from the multiple staff members and officers surrounding him as they restrained his still arms and legs. Even more so was the way he seemed to sense Gar's presence, slowly craning his neck to make direct eye contact before baring the most menacingly soft smile he had ever seen. His face was bruised and bloodied, with a particularly large gash just above his right temple, which a nurse was currently attempting to cover with gauze. By the looks of it, he shouldn't even be conscious. And yet, here he was, his expression completely unfaltering as he stared at Garfield. The green man was so unnerved by the action that he took a few subconscious steps back, before bumping into a pillar and being snapped out of it by his work earpiece loudly erupting in his skull.

"Logan! We need you downstairs, stat. Unknown code-red situation on 9th."

9th Street. Shit. Bad neighborhood. _His_ neighborhood.

Garfield sprinted through the hospital corridors, taking the stairs four at a time and ending up at the ambulance exit barely a minute later.

"'Bout time, lard-ass. Stop at the breakfast bar on your way down?"

The shape-shifter rolled his eyes at his friend's hypocritical humor. Roger was a large man, not just in fat but muscle as well. He boasted a receding hairline and large, thin-rimmed glasses.

"At least the breakfast bar has healthy options, dude. You look like you chowed down on a few quarter-pounders for breakfast," he retorted with a smug look.

Roger simply smiled, shrugged and patted his beer gut. He tried to laugh, but it came out forced. No matter how long you called this your profession, no one could hide their jitters on the way to the scene. It was almost always a tense ride; you never knew exactly what you were walking into.

They took a few sharp turns, whizzing past car after building after car, until Garfield started recognizing the tell-tale signs of 9th Street. Plywood-covered windows, rusted, booted cars- even a barbed-wire fence surrounding the neighborhood playground. The vehicle finally came to a halting stop, beaten only by a couple of cop cars. The sirens of more units sounded in the distance. The police who were already there were mostly focusing on controlling the small crowd , with a couple of officers clearly blocking someone from the audience's view a few feet within a seemingly deserted alleyway. Roger jogged toward those officers, who were kneeling over the person and seemingly tending to whatever wounds they had, to get an idea of what was happening. The rest of them quickly pulled out a gurney and other gear.

"Beast Boy!" someone in the crowd yelled behind him as they ran to the scene.

He shook his head briefly before the sight of deep violet hair splayed out on the concrete stopped him dead in his tracks.

No way.

"Gar, GO! What the hell are you doing?!"

Garfield stumbled forward, finally setting the gurney down next to the body. The girl before him was clad in a simple lavender t-shirt dress- which would have ended mid-thigh all around were it not ripped from the seam up on the left side- an oversized black knee-length sweater, and plain black sneakers. Her chest-length purple hair was matted with blood in several spots. Garfield tried to focus on his job, picking up on the fact that Roger was already calling it in to the emergency room staff.

"Female, about eighteen to twenty-one years. No Med-ID. Slight pulse. Critical condition. Going to need a rape kit."

Garfield felt his body moving- lifting the girl onto the gurney, strapping her in, placing her in a head brace, rushing back to the ambulance- but his mind was entirely elsewhere. He couldn't pretend he hadn't noticed the pale gray skin, or the wavy violet hair, or the freaking jewel in the middle of her forehead. His head was swimming with unanswered questions.

It was her. It had to be. It was Raven. And she was dying.

"Gar, hey, listen," Once inside the ambulance, Garfield found himself face to face with Pamela, a middle-aged woman with dark hair and laugh lines, staring into his eyes with her own kind blue ones. This woman's genuine niceness gave Kori a run for her money. "I need you to focus, okay? We know why you're freaking out, we know who this is, but we need you. She needs you. Let's save her, yeah?" She flashed him a tiny smile and glanced between the girl and he, finally snapping him out of it.

"Right. Yeah. Okay."

Gar set to work, gently thumbing her eyelids open and checking for dilating pupils. His breath hitched again when they revealed familiar amethyst irises, but he didn't stop working. He quickly reached behind him and retrieved a stack of gauze pads and tape, which he applied firmly to the- knife? Was that from a knife?- wound in her side. Reaching back again, he grabbed this time for a roll of gauze, winding it tightly around the long gash on her inner thigh. It looked to be at least seven inches long, and pretty deep at that. He began wrapping more gauze around it as blood easily soaked through the first few layers.

"May have hit the femoral artery!" he shouted out to no one in particular. As the others bustled around him, he continued applying pressure to the leg wound, listening keenly to Roger's second conversation with the hospital and knowing that there was nothing else he could do for the time being.

"We've got her I.D. Veteran. Rachel Roth, twenty years old, lives down on 4th. No restrictions, no medical info, no cell phone. We're prepping her for surgery, be ready when we get there. About two minutes out."

Gar drowned out the rest of the chatter, leaning forward to allow Pam access to the breathing mask behind him. This was going to be the longest day he had had in a very long time.

* * *

 **So... kind of short, right? I'm sorry! It's a preface! Next chapter will be up on Saturday. ^-^ My plan is to update this with longer chapters once a week. We'll see how that goes. c;**

 **Please let me know what you think! Read, review, you know the drill. It's like leaving a tip for a desperate waitress who hAS BILLS TO PAY AND IT'S NOT HER FAULT THE FOOD DIDN'T COME OUT IN A TIMELY MANNER OKAY.**

 ***breathes* Okay, I'm good. So much left-over rage from being a waitress. *cringe***

 **Anyways. Review. Message. I don't care. If you're an asshat I'm gonna delete it, otherwise constructive criticism is gladly welcomed and appreciated. :) Thank you friends! Have a lovely week!**


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own Teen Titans. I do not own Teen Titans. I do not own Teen Titans.**

* * *

 _Chapter 2_

Garfield's hands began to shake as he scrolled through his contact list. Who did he call first? Where did he start? How could he even begin to explain this? The page slowed to a stop, highlighting _Victor S,_ and before he knew it he was lifting the phone up to his ear.

One ring...

Two rings...

Three, four, five...

 _"Hi, this is Victor Stone and I can't come to the phone right now. Please leave your name and number and I-"_

Gar quickly jabbed at the end button.

So much for that.

It seemed right to try their old leader next, but availability-wise Gar's next best guess was Kori. He locked his phone and set it down in his lap again. He would really have to think about his wording this time. His eyes jumped up as the emergency-hall's doors slid open, allowing a tired-looking stranger to pass through. Garfield huffed for about the tenth time in the past hour. His patience was wearing thin. Very thin. Sitting around waiting was not his forte, it never had been. He always felt like he should be doing more.

When they had arrived at the hospital, he had immediately tried to follow the doctors back with Raven. Almost simultaneously, however, he was talked out of it by Pamela. She had assured Gar that there was nothing more he could do; that having him back there would simply be more of a distraction than anything else.

She was right.

It was still driving him crazy.

Interrupting his train of thought, the hospital intercom suddenly started blaring.

"ALL AVAILABLE STAFF, PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE MAIN SECURITY OFFICE. ALL AVAILABLE STAFF, PLEASE MAKE YOUR WAY TO THE MAIN SECURITY OFFICE."

Strange. Even in his current state, Garfield was still technically on the clock, and he supposed he fell under the category of 'available'. Besides, it couldn't hurt to momentarily take is mind off of everything. With a sigh, the green man heaved himself out of the uncomfortably firm waiting room chair and made his way upstairs. What could this possibly be about, anyways? It was rare for them to call that many employees to the same place unless it was an emergency. Perhaps they were bringing in a prisoner?

As his mind wandered, something on his trip through the corridors caught Gar's eye. He stopped in his tracks and backed up a few steps to perform a double-take. His mouth gaped open at what was before him. One of the hospital's rooms was in complete disarray- there were flickering fluorescent light fixtures dangling from the ceiling by mere wires, the cot was overturned with it's sheets strewn across the room, and the multiple vases and pictures that had been used to decorate the room now littered the floor in shards. It was filled with only a couple of seemingly perplexed guards, standing around chatting on their walkie-talkies and scratching their heads.

...So, that was probably what the meeting was about. Garfield made his way to the security office with a quickened pace.

"Oh, Gar, boy am I glad to see you."

He had just entered the office, where twenty or so people in all different kinds of uniforms were seated upon chairs scattered lazily around the room.

"What the hell happened?" Gar asked, striding up to the lead security officer, who seemed to have been speaking to everyone upon his entrance. The crowd was now murmuring amongst themselves behind him.

"It's that lunatic Adonis, he escaped. No idea how- did you see his room? We're trying to recover footage now. I'm glad you're here, though. I know you've dealt with him pretty directly before- you know, before... yeah. Anyways. What was he like? We were getting him ready for a psyche evaluation before this."

Garfield simply blinked in bewilderment.

"He's not capable of this. Or, at least he wouldn't have been back in the day. This doesn't add up, dude. Are you sure there wasn't-" He was cut off by the guard's walkie emitting loud white noise, before a roughened voice began shouting over the comm.

"The escaped patient is attempting to breach surgical services through the east wing! Backup needed!"

Without another word, Gar found himself sprinting alongside the guard, who was already on the phone with the police department, requesting help. Gar pulled out his work phone and dialed the front desk's emergency number.

"Nancy, hey, it's Garfield. Make sure all patrol in the building knows what's going on in the east wing. Thanks." He quickly hung up and rounded the corner to find that the very waiting room he had been in not ten minutes ago was an utter disaster. Perched atop one of the chairs was Adonis himself, his position almost mimicking the natural form of an ape. Surrounding him were several unconscious (at least, Gar hoped they were just unconscious) security guards, the leader of whom had been trailing behind him seconds prior. The burly man unhesitantly sprinted past Gar in a clear attempt to tackle Adonis, but he had already caught the foe's attention and found himself being hurled violently across the room, slumping to the floor in a heap. Garfield took a sight step forward, intending to go check on the man, but the second he made movement Adonis' bruised face snapped back to him, making eye contact.

Something was very wrong.

Out-of-the-blue superhuman strength aside, Adonis' eyes were now entirely black, as opposed to their normal dark amber hue. His skin was also much paler than he recalled it being all those years ago- almost unnaturally so, in fact- and he had now gone from the body type of a lanky teenage boy to that of a high-class muscle builder. While Gar certainly wasn't a scrawny little boy anymore, he was nowhere close to competing with this. Adonis looked as though his muscles were ready to rip through his skin. It wasn't just buff- it was grotesque. This wasn't the same man that he had transformed with, fought with, and laughed at five years ago. This was someone else completely.

Gar took a step back, slowly raising his hands in defense while speaking.

"Look, Adonis, what are you doing? This isn't you, dude. I don't do this anymore, okay? Don't make me fight you. Just let them take you, don't get yourself in any more trouble..."

Adonis crouched lower and narrowed his eyes, clearly readying himself for an attack. Gar felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up, his animal senses kicking in. His body was preparing for a fight. The beast he had suppressed for so long, that he had almost forgotten about, snarled in the back of his mind. This wasn't right. Adonis was just a human now, right? There was no reason his senses should be reacting this way.

The changeling continued to stare uneasily at the wild man before him. It felt like they were there, glaring, growling, breathing for an eternity before Adonis did something Gar wasn't expecting: He smiled. Again. Before he knew it, Adonis had leapt from the chair and pounced on him without ever touching the thirty feet of linoleum between them, which promptly cracked upon impact. Gar attempted to raise his fists in defense, but only had a few mere milliseconds to react before he was tackled onto the floor, trapped beneath a snarling Adonis. The crazed man still had a grin, now frothing, plastered onto his face, and he bared sharp fangs akin to the changeling's own pointed canines. Gar wriggled beneath him, but it was to no avail. How did Adonis get this heavy? Even with his muscle mass, this much force seemed unfeasible.

Adonis leaned down close to Gar's ear, and whispered one word in an impossibly deep, bone-chilling voice.

 _"Raaaaaaveeeeen..."_

From the corner of his vision, Gar saw eyes flash from black to ruby-red in one fluid motion, before his attention was caught by the man's fist raising into the air, revealing long, protruding claw-like nails. Gar braced himself as the hand began to swing back down, but Adonis was suddenly torn off of him by a neon green orb whizzing past and grazing the side of his face.

The shape-shifter quickly leapt up, but it seemed that he was joined by another. Adonis had now taken on the form of his werebeast from years prior, although this one had darker maroon fur accompanied by the same fully black eyes. It appeared to be meaner, stronger, and all-around more daunting. Gar's neck hair stood on end once again, and he clenched his teeth and fists in an attempt to halt the low guttural sound emitting itself from the back of his throat. He saw the beast's ears prick up in surprise, before it once again narrowed it's eyes and took off around the corner.

Shell-shocked, Gar finally turned to see none other than his old teammates, flanked by at least twenty police officers who were now quickly retreating in the direction they had just seen the creature go. Kori, clad in a plaid pencil skirt and button-up blouse, let her glowing eyes and fists dissipate before running forward and enveloping him in a huge hug. Looking over her shoulder, Gar smiled back at Victor, who donned a black athletic jacket and jeans. His eyes then moved on to Richard, dressed in a simple gray polo shirt and slacks, as well as sporting his signature stern look and crossed arms. The police chief gave him a friendly nod, which he returned graciously.

"What are you guys doing here?!" Garfield finally sputtered once released from the infamous death grip. Despite his confusion at the situation that had just taken place, he couldn't hide his enthusiasm (and anxiety) over the fact that his old friends had gathered again for the first time in years. Well, almost all of them. His mind was momentarily ripped from that thought as Victor began to explain.

"Well, I noticed I had a missed all from you and was fixing to call back when I got another from Kori, saying that her station had just received breaking news of the attack of a former Titan. She made a few calls, gathered some information, and, well... here we are."

Richard took over at this point. "We jetted over as soon as we found out it was Raven, but we have no idea what the hell his happening here. Why don't you fill in the blanks?"

"Uh.. right," Gar responded quickly, still trying to recover from his initial shock. "Well, that was Adonis." Everyone's eyes widened at this. "Yeah, I know, right? There's something really wrong with him. He's not the same Adonis we used to know. Listen, I think he's the one who attacked her. When we were down there, he... he said her name. I don't know what's going on with Ra... Rachel. That's her name now. Last I heard she was in surgery. She's pretty banged up, but I think she's going to make it, guys. Gonna be getting lots of stitches though, and they're, um... they're doing a rape kit."

Victor's eyes were so wide it looked like they were about to bulge out of their sockets, Richard's aegean eyes narrowed more than ever before, and Kori's emerald orbs flashed dangerously. Victor finally broke the silence.

"Well... what do we do now?"

They all instinctively looked to Richard, who raised an eyebrow at the familiar role he was being placed in. Just like old times.

"I would say we need to help track down Adonis... but I think Raven needs us the most right now. Bea- Garfield, can you find out if she's still in surgery?"

Gar nodded and picked up his work cell from the floor, dusting it off with the edge of his shirt, which he just realized was spotted with blood... where did that come from? He shrugged it off, and one minute and a very short conversation earlier he hung up the phone and looked at his friends.

"She's out of surgery."

Gar saw Richard's mouth moving, but for some reason couldn't hear anything. What bothered him more than that, though, was suddenly feeling something tickle the top of his spine. He reached back behind his head, swaying slightly, and realized his shirt was soaking wet. Pulling his hand back, he observed with faltering vision that it was now stained red.

"G-guys," he stuttered out. "I don't feel so good..." And just like that, he felt himself unable to keep from falling, catching a momentary glimpse of the ceiling tile before everything went dark.

* * *

 **I know, it's kind of a cliffie. D: I've somehow managed to have this be even shorter than the first chapter, which, I know, I'm the worst. BUT, I will update tomorrow! Promise. I'm just so dang tired and my boyfriend has been waiting on me for, literally, seven hours. Please bear with me! Following/favoriting gives you instant updates, and reviewing gives me motivation! I call that a win/win. Please let me know what you think and check back in tomorrow! Peace out y'all. c:**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I did it, guys! I finally own Teen Titans! ...Okay, yeah, no I don't. I'm gonna go eat my feelings now.**

* * *

 _Chapter 3_

Rachel Roth was confused, to say the least.

She had just opened her eyes to an obnoxiously bright room, which she quickly remedied by using her powers to close the blinds. It was easy to deduct that she was in a hospital. What she wasn't sure of, however, was how she had ended up there in the first place. Her powers still seemed to work, so that was positive news, at least.

She attempted to sit up, white spots still dancing in her vision, but winced at the soreness the movement brought her. Not sharp pain, but certainly not what she was expecting. She drew in a hiss as she leaned back onto the pillow, reaching under the blanket to trace the bumpy stitches on her abdomen, then drew it back out to try and rub the spots out of her eyes. When it was mostly successful, she scanned the room: a small bedside table to her left, topped with untouched packaged food and courtesy flowers from the hospital, a flat-screen t.v. with probably 10 channels in front of her, and to her right was the sleeping form of a girl with long, bright orange hair and- wait, what?! The sorceress choked on her own quick gasp, startling said girl awake.

There were no words. They simply stared at each other for what felt like minutes, hours, days, both unsure of where to even begin. Rachel finally opened her mouth to try to force something, anything out, but suddenly found herself trapped beneath her old friend, taken into a bone-crushing hug before she even had a chance to sputter. She wanted to hug her back. It felt like she should be hugging her back. This girl had once been her best friend for years, but it had been so long. She hadn't even had any friends since the Titans ended. So she sat there awkwardly in the alien's arms, not wanting to push her off but equally unwilling to return the embrace. She heard her friend sniffle.

"Star-" The girl immediately released her and stood back up on the side of the bed, quickly swiping at her eyes.

"Apologies, friend Raven. I am just quite relieved to know that you are doing the okay," she said with a soft smile, which Raven returned gracefully. Neither of them found it relevant to mention their alter egos.

"Thank you, Starfire," the name felt foreign on her tongue, but it rolled out of her mouth naturally. "I... have a lot to catch up on."

And just like that, Starfire took a soft seat on the bed, placed her hand gently over Raven's, and explained everything.

She explained how Beast Boy worked at this hospital and had tried to contact them about her, but they heard about it through word of mouth first; how Adonis had been attacking Beast Boy when they'd arrived, but escaped, leaving Beast Boy to become a patient himself; how she'd been in surgery through all of it, and how they'd heard her injuries were serious; how Beast Boy had come to believe that Adonis was the one who had attacked her; and finally, how they were all safe and sound and the only reason the boys weren't here was so that they could ensure Beast Boy didn't try to escape his room before he was discharged. It turned out that the changeling had sustained a minor head wound when Adonis jumped on him, causing him to smash his skull into the tile. A quick bandage job and few aspirins later, the man claimed he was good as new- but the doctors, of course, had to do their jobs in making sure he was actually so before releasing him. Especially since he was one of their own.

Raven nodded her head throughout the whole thing, closing her eyes and laying her head back in a vain attempt to remember anything. Nothing resurfaced. She huffed, figuring meditation would probably help at a later point. Starfire had done a great job at explaining everything in great detail, but the sorceress was soon to find there was one thing she had left out.

"Ahem?" A petite nurse gave a light courtesy knock and poked her head into the room before stepping in completely. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but could I have a moment to speak with Ms. Roth alone?"

Starfire gently squeezed her hand, which Raven just noticed she had been holding the entire time, and smiled before crossing the room and exiting. She could still see her shadow through the blinds on the hallway window. Raven mutely gave her attention to the nurse, who was now standing at her bedside and staring at her with an annoyingly consistent soft smile.

"We wanted to let you know that the rape kit came back negative."

Something shattered loudly outside the room, accompanied by a couple of startled screams. Starfire was inside the doorway again within seconds, a surprised expression gracing her features.

"Excuse me?" Raven choked out. What in Azar's name was she talking about?

"I- huh? I-I'm sorry, did you not-?" The nurse read the look of shock on the girl's face, confusedly glancing back and forth between the patient and her companion at the door. "Oh, oh god, I'm so sorry, your friend said she would explain everything a-and we all thought another nurse had already- oh gosh, I'm so so sorry. But, um, it's good news, right? I... I'll give you a moment. I'm so sorry." The nurse shuffled hurriedly out of the room, quickly replaced at her side by a concerned-looking Starfire.

"Friend Raven-"

"Whatis she talking about?"

Starfire sighed. "Friend Raven... I do not know everything, but I believe that the condition they found you in... it seems they assumed the worst," she fibbed.

Raven's confusion flared into momentary anger, and the table next to her was suddenly engulfed in black energy. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, taking a calming breath through her nostrils. The energy dissipated.

"And exactly what _condition_ was I found in?"

Starfire bit her lip and looked at her short platform shoes, clearly deciding whether or not she should tell the sorceress what she had heard. After some relentless pestering from her fiance, the hospital staff had finally told the group exactly what they knew about Raven. Where and how she was found, the status of her injuries, and everything in between.

"Starfire." She looked back up, finding herself under the stern gaze of a very confused old friend. She appeared angry, but underneath that she could tell that she was hurt and confused, possibly even scared. With another sigh, she began her second explanation of the hour.

"From what I understand, you were found in the alley c-covered in blood and... and your clothing was torn in such a way that it appeared to have been an attempted-" the girl was cut off by a sharp gasp from Raven as her memory came flooding back. She kept a pained expression for a few moments, hunching forward and clutching the sheets, before her body finally seemed to relax and she resorted to drawing her legs up Indian-style and burying her face in her hands. Starfire quickly noticed that she was trembling slightly, and took a seat on the bedspread once more. She reached out to touch the empath lightly on the shoulder, but withdrew it again. Raven drew in a few shaky breaths, calming herself down before dropping her hands to her lap. Keeping her eyes closed, she finally spoke.

"It was Adonis... but it wasn't Adonis. It was his... his form, his body, his soul, but he's under someone else's influence." Raven shakily reached for the small plastic water cup on her nightstand, taking a sip before looking at her friend with watery eyes. "He had been following me. I tried to cut through an alley to lose him, but he just appeared out of nowhere. I wasn't taking him seriously until I saw his eyes. They were pitch black, Star. At first it seemed like he was trying to take me, but then he just... lost it. It seemed like his motives changed halfway through. He started attacking me, he dug his nails into me- but they weren't just nails, they were long and sharp, like... like claws. And he did try to... you know." She cleared her throat, quickly shaking her head and attempting a casual shrug. "The last thing I remember is teleporting away from him as soon as I got the chance. I lost consciousness after that."

Starfire was on the verge of tears before she pounced on her again. This time, Raven hugged her back. She was okay. She was okay. Nothing had happened. It was negative.

"Ahem."

Starfire jumped off of her and turned to see her fiance, as well as the other two men of the group, standing in the doorway. She flashed another smile before running over and wrangling everyone's hands into her own, dragging them closer to the bed. Robin was the first to speak, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck as he did so.

"Uh, hey, Raven... er, Rachel was it? Good to see you're up," he finally sputtered out.

The empath gave him a curt nod. "Raven's fine," she responded with a tiny smile. You could practically see the tension melt from his body as he dropped his hand and returned the expression.

There were another few beats of awkward silence before Cyborg did his best to obliterate any and all tension in the room- he glanced around at the silent group and shrugged before finally bellowing, "Well, THERE'S OUR GIRL! Man, am I glad to see you alive. You look exactly the same! I mean, you got those bangs and your hair's a bit longer, but you're still good ol' Raven! Man, where have you _been_?!" The room seemed to hold it's breath after the half-robot asked the question they'd all been dying to. Beast Boy gently pushed in front of him, staring at her wordlessly with inquisitive eyes. His head was wrapped horizontally with white bandages, but his eyes screamed more of pain than any other part of his body.

Raven stiffened at the immense amount of emotion radiating from everybody. There was of course excitement and anxiety over seeing their old friend in such a state- or maybe, seeing her at all. But underneath everything was hurt. She knew why. She had abandoned them, all of them. She had broken her promise to keep in touch and ran for the hills as soon as she got the chance. She needed to tell them that it was easier that way, that it was for their own good. Starfire took a seat in the chair next to her and patted her hand.

"Friend Raven, I believe it is your turn to do the explaining."

The empath stifled another sigh, tucking her hands together in an attempt to still their trembling, and prepared herself for whatever was to come. No point in hiding the truth anymore.

"I felt it was safest to leave you all out of it. I really did," Stares. Cold, hard, confused stares. If she kept looking at them, she was sure to crumble under their gazes. Fidgeting with a loose thread on her thin hospital blanket, Raven stared blankly at her hands and forced herself to continue with another short exhale. "Before everything happened... towards the end, when we were still a team... I felt my father in my mind. He was speaking to me, causing nightmares, you know, the works. I even had to stop meditating unless it was absolutely necessary, because it allowed him easier access. I lost control, guys... The council's decision was just convenient timing, I was already figuring out how to leave. I'm sorry. I stayed in Azarath, alone, for two years. Eventually he just... disappeared. I think he might be gone for good. I've been back on Earth for a year now, and everything's been surprisingly normal. I'd hardly used my powers at all in the past year until this incident."

More stares. That was all she got as she concluded her explanation and willed herself to look up into her friends' faces. She stared at them nervously, shifting her eyes back and forth as her pulse quickened. Why weren't they reacting? Why did she care? Of course she cared. But did they? It had been so long...

Then, Beast Boy smiled. Not a full-grown grin, but a soft smirk. An intentionally reassuring quirk of his lip. And just like that, everything was okay. She gave the smallest hint of a smile in return, and before she knew it, she was surrounded with pure curiosity and concern. Not judgment. Not hatred. No longer pain. There were questions flying around of where she lived, if she had anybody else, how she was doing, if she worked; but all she continued to focus on was the silent conversation she was having with the room's green inhabitant. They stared at one another for a few moments, unmoving, until his small smile slowly grew into a grin and he began firing questions her way as well. Those few moments were enough for her to know that all was well for the time being. She was forgiven. She had her friends back.

* * *

 **...I'm not going to make promises anymore. Like, ever. I pull a Raven every time and I just break them into, like, a billion pieces.**

 **So, hopefully I'll update this tomorrow. But it could also be three weeks from now, because I'm the worst person ever. Good luck putting up with me and my awful writing!**

 **Do you pity me enough to review? Please? Reviews are MOTIVATING, people. I'm not gonna beg or anything b- PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAASSSSSSEEEEEEEE**

 **(also sorry this is super short again I tried)**


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